the vynsane asylum

my fave boba fett memory is from maybe 1st grade- a "bad kid" got him in the mail one day and brought him to school- at first recess he proceeded to declare a "game" whereby we would take turns throwing fett as far up the wall as we could, as hard as we could, and we did that until he broke into his components. The kid was real happy about this, for some reason

My Boba Fett died when I left him in his sniper post which was in a standing lamp in my sister's room. She came home and turned the lamp on and after awhile smelled a burning plastic aroma.

Fett's legs had completely melted to the bulb.

After that, if I wanted to use him, it was as a homeless, legless Vet on a mechanic's dolly begging for change from the other SW and GIJoe figures.

so now we know hhow bobba fett rly died

Foolery's version of Fett's death is somewhat more heroic than what happened in ROTJ. But once again, he had a jet pack and should have been able to fly away from the lamp.

That jetpack was more trouble than it was worth ><

strangely enough, in the EU it kicked all kinds of ass, and also worked decently in the prequels

Harrison Ford has been declared 'not dead' and allowed back to work on Disney's Stah Wahz.

Did they get a second opinion?

I'm pretty sure, looking at the photos of the cast for the new movie, that it's going to be a zombie flick. Mark Hamill even comes with his own night of the living dead face so that's a saving on the cost of prosthetics. Peter Mayhew is as we all know dead and has been haunting conventions for decades after asphyxiating in his Chewbacca suit during the shoot in Yuma on ROTJ. Carrie fisher was embalmed some years ago. This is the only explanation for her immobile carcass. Anthony daniels is a marionette and was never a real person. Though he desperately wanted to be. Kenny Baker is a glove puppet operated by Frank Oz. Although having retired from puppetry, Brian Henson will now be operating Kenny. Harrison Ford I'm reliably informed rejuvinates himself in a coffin filled with dirt. Callista Flockhart has a coffin next to his, though no amount of dirt can rejuvinate her career...

The more I see pics of what they look l like now, the more I think Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is going to be the superior movie (between that & EPVII). And we all recall what Marion looked like in Crystal Skull, don't we? It was nightmare material.

I'm loving how people that constantly shit all over the prequels are fawning over these because it's new Star Wars movies. I guess they can't see the irony in the fact that in a few years these will also be derided for being big balls of shit. I just can't even get excited for these to come out.

It's not that I want anything to happen to the main cast. They're my heroes. Nothing can ever change that.

That said, however, there's a part of me who wants one of the pivotal actors (not even Mayhew or Baker) to keel over just to see how badly that fucks up E7.

I have literally zero hopes for E7 or anything beyond. I won't deny that there's a bit of resentment over canning the EU. Which would be fine, if everyone busted their asses to try to top stuff like Shadows of the Empire, the Rogue Squadron series (both books and comics), the Thrawn Trilogy, and the Hand of Thrawn Duology. (Hell, by scuttling the New Jedi Order, they removed the Yuuzhan Vong from the equation, making Palpatine's EU motives for making the push for power nonexistent.) But from what I've seen so far, it just looks, well, okay. Star Wars cannot be "okay." Attack of the Clones was "okay." If the new stuff doesn't exceed the old, what was the point?

Yes, there were mountains of EU shit. But for every Waru, there's a Mara Jade.

There also seems to be a lot of indication that Return of the Jedi wasn't a happy ending. Yeah, the EU had the war going on still, but the gang didn't split up and Luke go evil. Seems like they're trying too hard for a postmodern deconstruction, making everything grimdark. Except the Stormtroopers, who look like stuffed animal manga versions of Stormtroopers. And Abrams has never left an impression on me, good or bad. (Should've let Whedon do it.)

Celebration's in two weeks, practically in my backyard. I don't have any interest in going. It's over $100 per person, for what? I don't think it's a stretch to assume it's going to be almost entirely E7. Maybe a little bit of Rebels, which I'm not nearly as interested in as I was before Fulcrum's identity was revealed, making the show essentially just the next seasons of Clone Wars under a new name. We know Hasbro ain't got shit, and if they surprise us, it's going to be all E7 and Rebels, and all this 5-POA bullshit they're killing collecting with.

(Don't get me wrong--I am absolutely going to take advantage of my Disneyland passes and hang out with folks there who are still into SW and have high hopes for the new stuff, including one ratfucker from here. I just can't go to a local Star Wars con without my kids, and cannot justify over $200 (kids' passes are slightly cheaper) when I know there's nothing new of real interest to me.)

Hey!!

Some of us are actively avoiding spoilers here!
Granted, that's partly from apathy. But also partly from not wanting to be spoiled.

Apart from the teaser trailer, I've not read or watched anything about the movie.

So shitcan that Luke is evil stuff if that's even true. Please and thank you.

He's not. It's not. These are not the spoilers you're looking for. Go about your willfull blindness regrading the new Star Wars movie as there is nothing to see here. Move along.... move along.

Regrading? What the fuck does that even mean?