Maxim's sexiest album covers

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Tue Mar 13, 2007 11:56 am

Another stupid list. I've not heard of half of these, and some make me wonder why they think they're so fucking sexy.

http://www.maximonline.com/slideshows/i ... lectId=162

How did they leave out the Scorpions?

(Okay, that one's more funny than sexy. But that chick in the second pic is so going to blow that dude, it ain't funny.)

What else is missing?

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Tue Mar 13, 2007 12:24 pm

I just did a really damned cursory overview of my CDs (and Mrs Anarky's).

First, how the fuck did they skip Amorica?

Next up, an oldie but a goodie. Joan may kick her ass, but it doesn't make this one any less hot, silly hairdo or not.

A mediocre new album from a self-proclaimed bitch who used to break all the rules. Her new music sucks, but her new album covers are much better.

Two that are more for the hot expressions than any actual imagery:

"Oh, I am so cute and naive and innocent. What are you going to do with that penis?"

"I'll tell you what you're going to do! You're going to stick it in me, and then we're going to sacrifice some puppies to the lord of darkness, but I'm still fucking hot!"

Possibly the most suggestive, though not obvious album cover:

I always rather liked this one, though Anthony Kiedis kinda spoils it:

Something about this one is simultaneously sexy as hell, and creepy as fuck:

Can't decide which of these is best. Nothing obvious, but Jewel could be wearing a fucking gorilla costume and covered in dog shit, and she'd still be hot. By her appearing on a cover, it becomes sexy by default.

I didn't forget Ms Jett, but she's too concerned with fucking to make sexy album covers.

Diabolical · Post by **Diabolical** » Tue Mar 13, 2007 12:30 pm

Can't find a pic of it, but the inside front cover of STP's greatest hits album "Thank You" was hot. You get to see the rest of this chick topless:

Then of course it isn't a sexy cover, but Norah is always hot:

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Tue Mar 13, 2007 12:31 pm

And my winner, though the scan sucks:

It's a collection of really shitty remixes, but the booklet is full of cool retro-looking pictures like this.

Funny thing is, when I did an image search, some dumbass PhotoShopped a bikini on her, and a lot of other dumbasses used that picture. Not like you can really see anything, anyway, so why fuck up a great pic?

Diabolical · Post by **Diabolical** » Tue Mar 13, 2007 12:36 pm

I think the bikini version was the "wal-mart" soccer mom version.

anarky · Post by **anarky** » Tue Mar 13, 2007 12:40 pm

I considered posting Come Away With Me for the same reason, but figured I more than pushed my luck with Kelly, Amy, Tori, and Jewel.

I always thought Feels Like Home would easily be up there if the pic was in better focus:

By the way, all her studio stuff is great, but her live stuff sucks ass. Except for that duet of "Wurlitzer Prize" she did with Willie.

The bikini on the WM version makes sense. They edit the craziest things. Like Nirvana's In Utero, where they changed the song title from "ABUSE Me" to "Waif Me."

My favorite WM edit was on the cassette of Siamese Dream. The liner, where the tracks were normally listed, was blank on theirs, so it didn't like "Silverfuck." Oddly, though, every cassette was inserted into the clear case so that track title was showing, anyway.

Speaking of edits, you have no idea how many versions of Amorica have the bush really poorly blurred out.

Eternal Padawan · Post by **Eternal Padawan** » Tue Mar 13, 2007 12:57 pm

Of Maxim's picks, The only one that gave me any kind of southern tingle was Shakira's.