the vynsane asylum

Every other major film franchise has its own thread Topic on here, so why not the Park?



A new short film by Colin Trevorrow before JWorld3 comes out next year.

I think they keep getting worse & worse - but then I only watched up until the 1st Chris Pratt one. Has there been one more?

Yes. Fallen Kingdom.

I'd seen a lot of people complaining about this, but I thought it was pretty good. Especially the bits in the credits.

I thought it was better than Fallen Kingdom. Especially the second half of FK.
Obviously you’re not gonna get A-list talent for your ‘free on the internet’ short film, but it was a decent little film.

We finally watched JW:Dominion last night. We were trying to find My Cousin Vinny on a streaming service and the internet said it was on Prime, but it was not. Dominion was on Prime though, so we watched that instead.

About 50 minutes into the movie, I turned to my fiancée and said “where are the dinosaurs in this fucking dinosaur movie??” After taking several minutes to bring viewers up to speed on where the last movie left things, and then spending 5-10 minutes to reintroduce Owen, and Claire. And their clone/daughter. And Ellie. And Alan. And Ian. Then there’s a kidnapping and a Kirkland brand M:I style car chase through Malta and Jesus Christ some fucking HUGE subplot about giant locusts eating the world’s crops. Like WTF? Then by the time we are getting some real Dino action in the movie, everyone who’s still there has so much plot armor, nobody is in real danger. Every time Claire was in danger, I kept joking the T-Rex was gonna show up and save her, then in the final act the T-Rex shows up and saves everyone from the even more evil carnivore Dino with the help of a feathered Wolverine Dino. I was half expecting them to high five afterwards.
The entire thing was a clown parade. They wasted the original three actors’ returns. Nostalgic wankfest.

Fuck, am I just getting old and curmudgeony? I feel like everything I watch now is just derivative crap.

Anyway, we had fun making fun of it.

Jurrasic Park 2 came out while my wife and I were dating. She wanted to see it for her birthday. I'm still a little pissed at her for making me watch it, which she reminds me of every so often.

Robocop 2 was ours. Jodi was scared & snuggled into me even though we were just friends. Thank you for the traumatizing hyper-violence, Frank Miller.

Camp Cretaceous is JP's Clone Wars. And Chaos Theory its Rebels. Both very solid shoes, far darker than you'd expect.

Went to see JW:Rebirth tonight. There have now been more Jurassic WORLD movies than there were Jurassic PARK movies.

As far as this one is concerned, its better than the last two for sure. Original screenwriter David Koepp came back to write this one. Positives include Decent action sequences and a not completely ridiculous reason for them to be on another island full of dinosaurs. Negatives include knowing exactly which characters are gonna survive and which ones aren’t. Including two people they didn’t even bother to name until AFTER they get eaten. And, as with plenty of these movies, people making poor choices that put them in unnecessary danger(which they miraculously, repeatedly survive. Sincerely, the fact that all four members of the family on the overturned boat survive the entire movie angers me.) But overall, it was an enjoyable monster movie that avoided the unnecessary extra plot bullshit of the previous two films( clones? locusts?) and went back to basics; people escaping dinosaurs.

Fresh idea for the next movie; when the characters see some magnificent dinosaur herd in the next movie, and everyone is standing around gobsmacked while the JP theme swells on the soundtrack, immediately cut it off as a dino comes from off screen and kills somebody.