the vynsane asylum

This morning I was telling Mabs about how I got bit by fire ants last week while looking in a manhole for a sewer line. I can't remember the exact wording, he more or less said

When you have your hand in a manhole and feel a prick, you should probably get out.

From an alter ego on Facebook (please tell me you didn't just swipe this from somewhere--it'd still be funny, but you'd no longer be the hero of the day if it's unoriginal):

The potatoes have eyes, the corn has ears and I'm pretty sure the cauliflower has some sort of genitalia.

haha, thanks, man. if it's a swipe, it's an unintentional one. i don't remember hearing it anywhere.

Cappy's current FB status may take the cake as quote of the year:

A discussion of music with my 4-year-olds: Hannah: "Dad, I just like 'Surfin' Bird', Phineas and Ferb songs, and 'Hello, Goodbye.'" Hayden: "I like Motorhead".

At least they both have great taste in music.

What I'd like to know is where the hell they learn this shit?!

Slicker wrote:What I'd like to know is where the hell they learn this shit?!

I'll give you a hint - it ain't their mother...

I have "Surfin' Bird" on a CD in the car and the kids insist on listening to that damn song a half dozen times every time we go anywhere. I had finally had enough and decided to see what was on the rest of the CD. As I was going through it, I would tell them who it was (I'm always telling them what I'm doing. I read somewhere that it helps with reasoning, logic, etc. Whatever...): "This is David Bowie, this is The Toadies, this is Motorhead..."

I got to "Godzilla" by Blue Oyster Cult and Hannah told me she didn't like that song and thus the above quote began.

Not exactly QOTD, but I felt the need to bump this thread.

http://www.facebook.com/#!/pages/Doing- ... 5358649..1

I just love the text. "If you have a passion for doing your mom...."

Comment on a news article on the recently-discovered Ardipithecus. I thought it seemed quite appropriate here.

I am not descended from apes and I'm insulted by the implication. I'm descended from three-toed sloths, and someday my people will rise up and...well, taking over the world is too much energy but we'll certainly rise up and...okay, probably go right back to sleep.

Comment on NPR's article about Sex and the City 2:

Is this that Golden Girls movie where Betty White plays a character named Samantha?

Sliki dropped this gem in a facebox conversation, proper context would ruin it

i haven't had a chance to get mine up

And mabs dropped this gem, same deal as Slick's:

I have become a man-sized Deuce.

This one is from another forum I look at- some asshat posted some idiotic thing about how he and his friend killed all these mice with some contraption and immediately the scorn came out- the very next post featured this hilarious, snide phrase mocking the OP

I am sure anyone with a basic understanding of siege weapons knows where this is going.

Maybe not as funny out of context but still a great, really-can't-ever-use-it kind of phrase no??

Went to a seminar last week to get training on pipe inspection. The engineer teaching the class started the session with this statement:

Sewage has been my bread and butter for 40 years.

It came across the same way as the "I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast" line in Happy Gilmore.

a little bit of back-story necessary to introduce this QotD - LEGO has a new ninja theme that is more fantastical than their previous more historic runs, and it's polarizing the LEGO fan community. you either love it or hate it. now, onto the QotD:

jsnweitzel wrote:If you're wondering how a ninja would defeat a tank, you're overthinking things.