Today.... I shocked myself in the pee pee hole.

[jjreason]

So there I was folding laundry, and it was a little bit more staticky than normal I must admit. I picked up a sheet & started to fold it in front of me, noticing that it was quite staticky, even moreso than the other items I had been folding.

When I folded the sheet in half the second time, it touched my flannel pajama pants right on the end of my ding dong & unloaded the entire megawatt burst of static up my urethra. This was not a pleasurable experience by any definition.

[Ran]

After I stopped laughing, I did feel bad for you.

[Diabolical]

I'm still laughing

[Tom Foolery]

Can an entire thread be Quote of the Day?

[Ran]

This might be the best thread title since "We only came for the nachos".

[anarky]

"I only shocked myself in the pee pee hole for the nachos."

[Tom Foolery]

I got out of the shower tonight and was drying myself off. As I finished and was about to leave the bathroom, I glanced down and saw giant blood drops all over the floor. WTF? I looked down and saw blood on my shin. How did I knick my shin—oh wait another drop just fell, not my shin. Fuck, is my nose bleeding? Nope..where the fuck?? I start surveilling my body in the mirror and now I’m leaving footprints in the blood on the floor.

Don’t ask me how, but somehow I nicked my ballsack. And let me tell you that part of the body the blood flows freely. After about three or four wads of TP completely saturated, I had to open the door and ask my fiancee to come upstairs without completely freaking her out. I ended up having to clamp it off with a paper towel, then a washcloth. Then get back in the shower and rerinse while my better half cleaned and disinfected the crime scene that used to be the bathroom. I went and laid down, keeping pressure on it for twenty minutes before it finally stopped.

Have no idea how or why. I wasn’t manscaping or anything. I just too briskly dried off down there I guess?
But holy shit.