Fugly-sexy

[anarky]

Y'know, I'd always planned that, if one of my characters were made into a movie, Allyson would be his girlfriend and would end up captured by... well, don't want to say too much, but she'd end up in Leia's metal bikini.

As of right now, making that movie has moved significantly higher on the priorities of my life.

to the nth power.

[Ran]

A-prospectin' I go.

Somebody's faster.


The American Pie movies obviously made her look dorky for the role...but by the 3rd movie she was looking pretty good. I've just never seen her in anything outside that role.

Does Tina Fey from SNL count or is she widly known as a hottie?

[vynsane]

Does Tina Fey from SNL count or is she widly known as a hottie?

good call... hot bod, awesome sense of humor, but kinda fucked up face. still the part that's not fucked up is pretty cute, so... yeah, she totally fits the bill.

[Ran]

Well then, a lot of women from SNL I suppose could fit the bill. There were even a few times I thought Victoria Jackson was do-able.

[anarky]

This phenomenon you refer to is what I like to refer to as "Ice Skater Cute" Watching petite little ice skaters in "revealing" outfits zip around the ice at a distance makes them look really tasty. but then when you get to them up close you're all "ugh". This also applies to Gymnasts and swimmers.

I must respectfully disagree.

You see, the phenomenon you mention, while common (and I shall henceforth adopt your name of "Ice Skater Cute"), results in a different conclusion. You see, under this phenomenon, the female in question is attractive at a distance, but nauseating up close. This is especially common among female athletes.

Similar to both the other unexplainable phenomena in question is the "butterface." A woman is, as you are likely aware, a butterface if she is attractive from the neck down, and a harpy above. For instance, the Asian woman from Sideways, who is pretty decent up to an altitude of approximately 4.5', above which she resembles the unholy coupling of a horse and a praying mantis.

No, "fugly-sexy" is even stranger. A woman is fugly-sexy if she is just plain, unarguably unattractive, but possessing some intangible quality (often related to personality, or maybe to voice) that inspires one to simultaneously think the seemingly incongruous thoughts "Dear sweet God, why do her keepers let her out of the house?" and ""I'd give my left nut to press her up against a wall, pull off her panties, and fuck her brains out until one or both of us died of starvation."

Using the aforementioned Joan Osborne as an example, we have an unmistakably "ugly" woman. Her teeth make British people say, "Dear me, you have some bad teeth." She is chubby, and not in a sexy "Marilyn Monroe" sort of way. On top of that, her face looks as if it belongs to someone who weighs at least three times what she weighs. Her hair is permanently disfigured as the result of a truly unfortunate perm accident years ago, and she made the questionable decision to sport a truly unflattering nose-ring. And, she probably has worms.

And yet, sir, I challenge you to watch the video for "Right Hand Man" without fantasizing about all the things that one could possibly do sexually with this woman. It makes no sense in an evolutionary sense, as it would tend to point toward survival of the ugliest, but it does exist.

This is not to be confused with "devolving," in which a woman declines at a remarkably fast rate, usually before her prime, and without any visible cause (such as drug use or illness), often bypassing the butterface categorization entirely. Cameron Diaz is a prime example of this unfortunate phenomenon. You would be hard-pressed to find a sexier woman than Diaz in The Mask. But now? Ewww. Just ewww. And she's boinking Justin Timberlake, which makes it even worse.

[Ran]

This is not to be confused with "devolving," in which a woman declines at a remarkably fast rate, usually before her prime, and without any visible cause (such as drug use or illness), often bypassing the butterface categorization entirely. Cameron Diaz is a prime example of this unfortunate phenomenon. You would be hard-pressed to find a sexier woman than Diaz in The Mask. But now? Ewww. Just ewww. And she's boinking Justin Timberlake, which makes it even worse.

Ok, so it's not just me. How the hell did she look so good in The Mask and, well, end up where she is now?

I've seen some pictures of Shirley Manson where she looks hot. But, I've seen just as many where she looks like her eyes are way too far apart. Sort of like a flounder with a wig and some lipstick.

[vynsane]

Sort of like a flounder with a wig and some lipstick.

holy fuckin' shit that's lol!

same can be said for tori spelling - horrid actress, and a face that inspired my friends and i in college to yell "it's a trap!!" admiral ackbar style every time she showed up on tv, and yet sometimes...

perhaps she's not in this category as much as the butterface category, however.

another fugsexy chick is the lead singer from "sneaker pimps" - she had a snaggletooth thing going on but she was just HOT in the video for "six underground"...

[calamity jane]

I GUESS THAT'S HOW JOANIE STUBBS SEES ME. I'M UGLIER'N A FUCKING COW PIE, 'N SHE GOBBLES UP MY FUCKIN' SNATCH LIKE SHE'S FUCKING PAC-MAN!

[The Grin]

So, jane, I see you finally got your twat unstuck from your zipper.

[Ran]

Liana K from Ed The Sock.

http://www.edthesock.com/News/article/sid=125.html

Look around to see if you can find some full body pics of her. Her face isn't great, but when you see the whole package with the red hair...

[Slicker]

Also, don't know if it was mentioned, but on Buffy Alyson played a lesbian...that kissed other girls...quite often...

[anarky]

In my not-exactly-daily daily usage of Sleazer's "Golden Shovel," I have to add Samantha Bee to the list.

I can't explain why. It doesn't make sense. She's about as attractive as a wildebeest in a tutu.

And, yet....

[Double_G]

Am I really the only guy on here who doesn't think Cameron Diaz is ugly? I thought she was the hottest out of the new "Charlie's Angels".

Although, this doesn't really do her justice:

[UKWildcat]

I don't think Diaz is ugly. She definitely has an interesting look about her though, thats for sure.

And I would bounce the shit out of Tina Fey, for the record. Me likey...

[Diabolical]

And I would bounce the shit out of Tina Fey, for the record. Me likey...

But Tina Fey isn't Fugly.


Diaz ain't bad, but she hasn't looked really good since The Mask.