Top Summer Films of 2017
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- Tom Foolery
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Top Summer Films of 2017
Guess what time it is!!? It's time to guess which summer movie is gonna win big at the box office.
Rule numero uno. No Animated Movies. So Cars 3 and Despicable Me 3 and whatever other third sequels might be coming out. Studios should just slap 3 on all their animated movies and they'd make more. People are sheep.
Rule numero douche. It's all about the benjies. Not which movie is 'kewl' or 'boss' or 'exceptionally well made'. This is a race to the top of Scrooge McDuck's vault.
I left Kong, Beauty and the Beast, and Power Rangers off the list because they're a little too early in the year. Even though Beast will probably beat most everything else on the list.
The last slot came down to Valerian and Dark Tower, and since I haven't seen a trailer for Dark Tower, I gave the slot to Valerian.
Unlike last year, this field seems to be wide open. Each Furious movie seems to make more than the last one.
Guardians has a lot to live up to.
Alien Covenant is hampered by its R rating and the fact it's a sequel to Prometheus.
Pirates 5. That ship has sailed. Pun intended. Did you know this movie was finished like two years ago, and Disney couldn't find a place on their schedule that wasn't already staked out by their own other better selling franchises like Marvel and Star Wars.
Wonder Woman is hampered by its connection to Warner Bros and DC.
The Mummy. Has a very bankable cast.
Transformers 5 will make more money than it has any right to.
Spider-Man. This one is up in the air. The last Spidey movie was a "disappointment". Sony can't afford another one of those.
War for the Planet of the Apes. Sadly won't make as much as it has a right to.
Valerian. I don't think this has a chance, but damn it looks fun.
So what do you think.
Rule numero uno. No Animated Movies. So Cars 3 and Despicable Me 3 and whatever other third sequels might be coming out. Studios should just slap 3 on all their animated movies and they'd make more. People are sheep.
Rule numero douche. It's all about the benjies. Not which movie is 'kewl' or 'boss' or 'exceptionally well made'. This is a race to the top of Scrooge McDuck's vault.
I left Kong, Beauty and the Beast, and Power Rangers off the list because they're a little too early in the year. Even though Beast will probably beat most everything else on the list.
The last slot came down to Valerian and Dark Tower, and since I haven't seen a trailer for Dark Tower, I gave the slot to Valerian.
Unlike last year, this field seems to be wide open. Each Furious movie seems to make more than the last one.
Guardians has a lot to live up to.
Alien Covenant is hampered by its R rating and the fact it's a sequel to Prometheus.
Pirates 5. That ship has sailed. Pun intended. Did you know this movie was finished like two years ago, and Disney couldn't find a place on their schedule that wasn't already staked out by their own other better selling franchises like Marvel and Star Wars.
Wonder Woman is hampered by its connection to Warner Bros and DC.
The Mummy. Has a very bankable cast.
Transformers 5 will make more money than it has any right to.
Spider-Man. This one is up in the air. The last Spidey movie was a "disappointment". Sony can't afford another one of those.
War for the Planet of the Apes. Sadly won't make as much as it has a right to.
Valerian. I don't think this has a chance, but damn it looks fun.
So what do you think.
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- jjreason
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
I'm horrified by my suspicion that TF will outgun Guardians 2. Maybe I'm wrong, Guardians had good pull last time. If it's good enough to warrant second viewings, it should do fine. I'm not sure where these two will fit in with the others, but Hermione will do fine as well I'm sure.
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- Ran
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
They are re-making The Mummy as in the Brendan Fraser movie? Was the first one even popular to begin with?
Its funny that they are all spin-offs, sequels, or remakes. I'm going with Guardians of the Galaxy.
Its funny that they are all spin-offs, sequels, or remakes. I'm going with Guardians of the Galaxy.
- Diabolical
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
Guardians of the Galaxy was a risky unknown property made by a massive hit maker and it was one of the top films of the year. It was even #1 for a while and ended up at #3.
I'm hoping the public wants more real entertainment than robots humping.
BTW, the #1 film of 2014?
American Sniper.
What. The. Fuck?
As for The Mummy - No, it's not a remake of the Brendan Fraser garbage.
This is Universal's reboot of the classic Universal monster franchise, and yet another attempt at a shared cinematic universe.
I'm hoping the public wants more real entertainment than robots humping.
BTW, the #1 film of 2014?
American Sniper.
What. The. Fuck?
As for The Mummy - No, it's not a remake of the Brendan Fraser garbage.
This is Universal's reboot of the classic Universal monster franchise, and yet another attempt at a shared cinematic universe.
"As they say in China, 'Arrivederci'!"
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- Ran
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
Ok. That makes way more sense than Brendan Fraser's version.Diabolical wrote:
As for The Mummy - No, it's not a remake of the Brendan Fraser garbage.
This is Universal's reboot of the classic Universal monster franchise, and yet another attempt at a shared cinematic universe.
- Tom Foolery
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
Which is bullshit. Because it was released in like 5 theaters around Christmas so that it would be eligible for Oscar noms that year. It got released wide in January 2015 and that's where it made ALL its money. But it gets counted for the previous year because it made like $17.50 in 2014. It wouldn't have cracked the top five of 2015 where it should have been placed.Diabolical wrote:
BTW, the #1 film of 2014?
American Sniper.
What. The. Fuck?
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”
- Diabolical
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
And it was just an ok movie.
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*For the creation of the Golden Deuce Award.
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- Slicker
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
The cult status that Guardians has gained ensures its #1.
Sweet berry wine!
- anarky
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
I want TF to bomb so badly that Hasbro has to reboot.
It won't happen, though.
It won't happen, though.
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- Tom Foolery
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
I knew it was gonna do well, but holy shit.I left Kong, Beauty and the Beast, and Power Rangers off the list because they're a little too early in the year. Even though Beast will probably beat most everything else on the list.
Between their Star Wars, Marvel, and live action animation remakes, as well as their two headed animation beast of Disney and Pixar, Buena Vista pretty much now makes the top ten highest grossing movies every year.
How long before Disney buys Hasbro do you think? Or ALL the other studios...??
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”
- Ran
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
Is it weird that I had no recollection of there being another Pirates of the Caribbean until I saw the commercial for the DVD today?
- Tom Foolery
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
No. It was very mediocre.Ran wrote:Is it weird that I had no recollection of there being another Pirates of the Caribbean until I saw the commercial for the DVD today?
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”
- Diabolical
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
I didn't see it, but it was apparently better than the last one.
"As they say in China, 'Arrivederci'!"
*For the creation of the Golden Deuce Award.
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- Ran
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
Did they not have a big marketing budget? I know I saw commercials for every other movie on the above list. I don't remember anything for Pirates.
- Tom Foolery
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Re: Top Summer Films of 2017
They finished the movie a couple years ago, but every time they put it on the schedule, it was up against one of Disney's bigger box office draw franchises , like Marvel, or Pixar etc. They didn't want to cannibalize their own BO, so they kept pushing it back.
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”