Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

movies are cool. here is a place to talk about how cool they are. or maybe how much they suck, sometimes. like that fucking piece of shit 'mac and me'. worst fucking movie ever, a two-hour ad for fucking coca-cola.

Moderators: Batman, Zero, John Madden, Bob Ross, General Zod, Richard Simmons

User avatar
Tom Foolery
I HAVE THE POWER!!!
Posts: 4721
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2007 7:57 pm
Location: I bought a house!

Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Tom Foolery »

If this wasn't a Warner Bros/DC property and therefore destined for self sabotage by the Studio that hates its Super Hero IPs, I might actually be excited about Dwayne Johnson playing Capt. Marvel AKA Shazam. I don't necessarily think The Rock is a great actor, but he seems genuinely nice and his "acting" skills would perfectly fit the cornball that's inherent in a Shazam movie.

The trick is hitting that cornball sweet spot. If they go for intentionally goofy, it'll suck. If they go for DC new typical stance of Gritty Realism in Comics films that Nolan and Snyder love, it'll suck. But if they aim for serious and get the right shitty director (Brett Ratner!!) he just might unintentionally deliver an exactly campy film even if it wasn't his intention. I realize that's naive optimism on my part.

But when giving an interview teasing his next project, Johnson said "Just say the word" hinting at a possible Shazam film, for that brief moment I got excited about a Shazam film with him in it. That's such a great Tag line for the film.

So right now, before they've even started, WB has a Shazam movie I'd go see. Now they just have to hire the wrong screenwriter, wrong director, let Johns, Didio, Harras and Nelson interfere, miscast the rest of the film, come up with awful CG, and make poor PR choices to make it suck like the rest of their products.
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”

Image
User avatar
vynsane
master of the universe
Posts: 6193
Joined: Sat Aug 31, 2002 11:16 pm
Location: in my quiet place, punch-dancing out my rage
Contact:

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by vynsane »

actually i could see dwayne as Black Adam.
Life is short. STUNT IT!
User avatar
Tom Foolery
I HAVE THE POWER!!!
Posts: 4721
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2007 7:57 pm
Location: I bought a house!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Tom Foolery »

So far it's a toss up as to who he's playing; Marvel or Adam.
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”

Image
User avatar
Tom Foolery
I HAVE THE POWER!!!
Posts: 4721
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2007 7:57 pm
Location: I bought a house!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Tom Foolery »

How sad/hilarious is it that WB cast Johnson in a role five years ago that they still haven’t gotten around to filming.
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”

Image
User avatar
Diabolical
(includes alternate sneering hissy fit head sculpt)
Posts: 7061
Joined: Mon Jul 11, 2005 8:40 pm
Location: Doofenshmirtz Evil, Inc.

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Diabolical »

As Marvel supposedly did with Vin Diesel in a non-Groot role.
"As they say in China, 'Arrivederci'!"
Image
*For the creation of the Golden Deuce Award.
User avatar
jjreason
(includes alternate sneering hissy fit head sculpt)
Posts: 8026
Joined: Tue Sep 03, 2002 1:14 am
Location: Out there somewhere.

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by jjreason »

Is Shazam! not a thing right now? What the hell is going on with the Rock version?
"Something inside me....."
User avatar
Tom Foolery
I HAVE THE POWER!!!
Posts: 4721
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2007 7:57 pm
Location: I bought a house!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Tom Foolery »

jjreason wrote:Is Shazam! not a thing right now? What the hell is going on with the Rock version?
He was cast as Black Adam, Shazam’s nemesis, several years ago, and was gonna be in his own movie...eventually.
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”

Image
User avatar
jjreason
(includes alternate sneering hissy fit head sculpt)
Posts: 8026
Joined: Tue Sep 03, 2002 1:14 am
Location: Out there somewhere.

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by jjreason »

Oh, ok. I actually read a positive review of current Shazam but dismissed it immediately - I haven't seen any DC since the whole Martha fiasco & I'm not about to start with that.
"Something inside me....."
User avatar
anarky
sometimes not actually existing
Posts: 17590
Joined: Tue Sep 03, 2002 4:50 pm
Location: Fucking shit up, yo!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by anarky »

Shazam is actually really good. They acknowledge there's a lot of silliness in the original concept and try to work him into a present-day setting, kind of like the original Superman. I need to watch them both again, but it could be the better of the two Captain Marvel films.

Without spoiling too much, there are three massively Golden Age elements I was hoping to see. Two came to pass. The third, well, there's no talking tiger in a suit (though there is some major symbolism involving a tiger that is probably a nod to Tawny).

I'm willing to bet neither of the "surprise twists" will be especially shocking to most of us here. (They're the two Golden Age bits I mentioned, and will come out of left field for the vast majority not familiar with the OG Captain mythos.)
Image
*--For behavior unbecoming anyone, perpetrated in real time over an extended--AH, FUCK IT! MORE MALIBU, BITCHES!!
User avatar
Tom Foolery
I HAVE THE POWER!!!
Posts: 4721
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2007 7:57 pm
Location: I bought a house!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Tom Foolery »

The Mr. Mind thing was pretty obvious since they lingered on the shot of him at the beginning of the film, and then again to show his jar was broken.
But how many people know who Mr. Mind is? His “Q” rating is pretty obscure even for comic nerds, let alone the general movie going public.

Tawny better show up in the sequel.


I also think I enjoyed this more than Capt Marvel.
It was more cheesy fun like Guardians or Ragnarok.
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”

Image
User avatar
Tom Foolery
I HAVE THE POWER!!!
Posts: 4721
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2007 7:57 pm
Location: I bought a house!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Tom Foolery »

Black Adam is a very forgettable movie. Way too many slo-motion scenes that serve no purpose, the CGI villain in the third act looks like something off a PS3, and they turned some cool DC characters like Dr Fate and Hawkman into one dimensional boring antagonists for Adam. Atom Smasher is the “comedic” relief and he wasn’t funny at all. Just lots of wasted potential. I blame the director, whose resume is a list of movies I’ve seen, but can’t recall anything about. And the fact that DC has no Kevin Feige to steer their franchise and keep shit like this from being made.

They cast Johnson in this almost a decade ago. It wasn’t worth the wait. Dull.
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”

Image
User avatar
Diabolical
(includes alternate sneering hissy fit head sculpt)
Posts: 7061
Joined: Mon Jul 11, 2005 8:40 pm
Location: Doofenshmirtz Evil, Inc.

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Diabolical »

Imagine having a passion project for 15 years and it turns out meh.
"As they say in China, 'Arrivederci'!"
Image
*For the creation of the Golden Deuce Award.
User avatar
anarky
sometimes not actually existing
Posts: 17590
Joined: Tue Sep 03, 2002 4:50 pm
Location: Fucking shit up, yo!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by anarky »

Every site on the internet spoiled the post-credit stinger.
Image
*--For behavior unbecoming anyone, perpetrated in real time over an extended--AH, FUCK IT! MORE MALIBU, BITCHES!!
User avatar
Tom Foolery
I HAVE THE POWER!!!
Posts: 4721
Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2007 7:57 pm
Location: I bought a house!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by Tom Foolery »

anarky wrote: Mon Oct 24, 2022 10:56 am Every site on the internet spoiled the post-credit stinger.
To be fair, Dwayne Johnson has been “spoiling” it on his social media for months. He’s about as subtle as a rear end collision. He’d be ‘Nobody on this planet can defeat Black Adam. ON THIS PLANET…’ and then do a silent film vaudeville wink afterwords. Shit like that.

The movie was not 100% crapfest. There are some things to enjoy about it. And Johnson seems custom made as a movie star to be in a comic book movie. But the missed opportunities far outweigh the decent stuff. Like all the wasted scenes between him and the bad guys armed with guns and shit. He’s indestructible. We get it. Don’t need to see him killing dozens of bad guys in like seven different scenes in the movie. And Hawkman and him having the same tough guy stare down conversation over and over and over. And did I mention the slo-mo shots? Because hahaha Jesus there are A LOT of slo-mo action shots.

You gotta wonder how shitty Batgirl was, because they thought this was good enough to leave on the calendar.
"No Tom Foolery today, Ron. I'm tired of looking at your dreadful, speckled mug."
"Why do you hurt me in this way, Harry?"
”It’s a grid system motherfucker. Eleven up and one over, you simple bitch.”

Image
User avatar
anarky
sometimes not actually existing
Posts: 17590
Joined: Tue Sep 03, 2002 4:50 pm
Location: Fucking shit up, yo!

Re: Just Say The Word: SHAZAM!

Post by anarky »

Tom Foolery wrote: Mon Oct 24, 2022 11:49 amYou gotta wonder how shitty Batgirl was, because they thought this was good enough to leave on the calendar.
It had Michael Keaton as Batman. It could've been 2 Girls 1 Cup: The Continuing Adventures (co-starring Scrappy Doo and rated PG-13) and still been a massive success.
Image
*--For behavior unbecoming anyone, perpetrated in real time over an extended--AH, FUCK IT! MORE MALIBU, BITCHES!!
Post Reply