G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

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Rollo Tornassi
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by Rollo Tornassi »

Speaking of Aerosmith, that just reminded me of that Star Trek spinoff series starring Ed Asner where Steven Tyler guest starred as the alien bounty hunter. I remember they had just killed of Stephen Collins character on ST:The New Adentures. That was like what, season 5? So that was right around '84 or '85. And the black chick(forgot her name) left the Enterprise and Asner played the Starfleet Admiral. It was only on for a season. Crap, what was her name?
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by arnaky »

Selina Kyle. For a fan, you sure have a short-term memory, Rollo. How'd you forget her after her character spun off into a series of Broadway musicals?
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by Rollo Tornassi »

No, I was blanking on the actress. I foobar'd her(as an aside, whoever created search engines like foobar.com deserves a Nobel). It was Phylicia Rashad. She never did anything after that.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by Ran »

anarky wrote:Want to read something funny?

Go to HisStank and check out the hipsters bitching about Aerosmith being on the soundtrack to GIJoe 2. Apparently people who live in their parents' basement don't like the boys from Boston.
Holy carp. One of those idiots said that the only good song Aerosmith ever made was for the Armageddon soundtrack.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by anarky »

Ran wrote:
anarky wrote:Want to read something funny?

Go to HisStank and check out the hipsters bitching about Aerosmith being on the soundtrack to GIJoe 2. Apparently people who live in their parents' basement don't like the boys from Boston.
Holy carp. One of those idiots said that the only good song Aerosmith ever made was for the Armageddon soundtrack.
Yeah, that was the one comment that really screamed, "Share me!!!!11!!!"

That's not the worst Aerosmith song, but it's damned close, and it's their worst soundtrack contribution. (Unless they were talking about the awesome other song they did for Armageddon that no one knows, "What Kind of Love Are You On," which I doubt.) Fuck, they even did better songs for shit like Charlie's Angels and motherfucking Rugrats Go Wild.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by anarky »

More fanboy humor: check out the people bitching about Snake Eyes' armor and trying to sound like they know jackshit about history.

All sorts of comments like "Ninjas didn't wear armor!!!!!" and "Your right ninjas didn't wear armor but they didn't use guns either its a movie."

Oh shit! Then what the fuck is this? Obviously a hoax, or some fanboy shit by someone who didn't know history.

If you can sort through all the misinformation (most of it from 1980 onward), the ninja were actually a fuckton cooler than the image we have of a silent dude in black pajamas. Ninjas were mostly farmers, except when sent on missions. An average ninja knew only the ninja he received orders from and answered to (who might not even technically be his superior), and had no idea which of his fellow townsmen (or possibly townswomen) was the head of the whole organization. And they often did fight on the battlefield, wearing armor and shooting firearms in broad daylight.

Seriously, I'd love to see an accurate movie or comic book about a ninja character in the 1600s, but everyone would say it was bullshit and it wouldn't sell. :(
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by Rollo Tomassi »

Holy Twatfur!!! GIJoe just got pushed back until MARCH OF NEXT YEAR!!! :shock: It was supposed to come out in a month!
They said they want to do a real good 3D version of the film because "Titanic 3D" did well.

What. The. Fuuuuuck?!?
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by Ran »

Wow.

There was a headline the yesterday about the studio working on the score. While I don't claim to know much about the movie making process, it seemed to me that something like that would be done by now.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by RoIIo Tomassi »

"Make it 3D" is studio code for "we are going to get our Box Office ass kicked by Spider-Man and Batman"
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by anarky »

Man, this is a bummer.

All of y'all know my two favorite comics of all time: Batman and GIJoe. Even without Avengers and Spidey, this looked like a fucking amazing summer for comic book movies as far as I was concerned. We already know Nolan makes awesome Batman films; his "bad" one is still one of the best appearances of Batman outside a comic. And Joe 2 looked like they actually did some research.

Gotta wonder: what the fuck will be up with the figures now? Are they still coming out? Will they rot on shelves without a movie, making the Joe franchise look even shakier in the toy aisle?

Maybe, just maybe, someone might have some fucking sense and realize that Renegades is the only thing that's actually gotten people excited about Joe in ages. I doubt it, though.

3D. Fuck.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by RoIIo Tomassi »

I would think its too late to stop the Toys from coming out. And it's not like the GIJoe brand isn't a toy aisle perennial with or without a film to promote.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by anarky »

For the past decade, though, it's been a perennial loser in the toy aisle.

Relaunched Joe vs Cobra line floundered. Didn't help that there were a billion repaints of everyone, and all figures were two-packs (sometimes requiring you to get multiples of one guy to get a new figure).

JvC led into Spy Troops and Valor vs Venom, none of which did particularly well. The last few waves were an unnamed direct-to-consumer line. They wound up on clearance at TRU.

Sigma Six bombed from the get-go.

The 25th Anniversary line did well, at least at first. But they killed it with pegwarmers. They killed it hard. Then officially axed it for the
Rise of Cobra line.

I don't think I need to mention what a clusterfuck ROC was, both in terms of the movie and the toyline. Many Wal-Marts still won't carry any GIJoe at the store level (though that might've changed with Retaliation). You can still find that shit at Ross.

Resolute was confined to a subline of the 25th Anniversary line and two overpriced mail-away exclusive sets (which, uh, wound up at Ross). Of course, it didn't matter; with the ONE airing of it, at 1 in the morning, it's not like a legion of new fans were hunting for the figures.

Pursuit of Cobra was poised to do well. Massively overproducing that fucking Arctic Destro and Zartan-as-Raptor killed it. More than half the figures were impossible to get.

30th Anniversary is like 25th--stuff does well at first, but pegwarmers that anyone should've been able to spot a mile away clog shelves. The later stuff is pretty damned tough to get. Oh, and stores jacked up prices a few times, presumably so the Retaliation stuff would be cheaper by comparison.

Renegades... fuck. They got someone's retarded son from kindergarten to handle that, after he was run over by a bus and put on a ventilator. No other way to explain it. Hasbro owns the fucking network and did the fucking show, and there were no toys for over a goddamned year? By which point, of course, the show had been canceled for months. Oh, and like that other reboot cartoon that was actually loved by the small number of people who knew about it and saw it, the figures were a subline of the 30th Anniversary line. Some were actually vintage updates of characters who'd appeared in different forms in the show. (Airtight looked the same. Law did not.) We got the whole basic team, except for Roadblock for some reason. Oh, and Ripcord, since the figure they released looked NOTHING like Ripcord. As for bad guys, no Bio-Viper, Baroness, or Mindbender, the guys we saw all the time on the show. There was the Trooper, their one out-of-the-ballpark hit, plus a massively overproduced figure of a guy who sits in a chair and communicates through doctored transmissions to look different (Cobra Commander), as well as an equally overproduced figure of a guy who was a one-off villain, actually fucking killed in the show (barring some major miracle), who appeared in one episode (possibly the weakest of the series) and looked absolutely nothing like any previous version (Firefly).

Meanwhile, the other thing to get people excited: fucking repaints being sent to closeout and bargain stores. Fucking repaints. Simple shit we've been literally begging for: Snake Eyes IV, Storm Shadow III, basic Cobra and hooded Cobra Commander in black....

They fucking need to listen to fans. We tell them what we want, they seem to recognize it, and then they ignore it. I asked about Billy at Comic-Con several years ago. They knew we wanted him. He was the most requested fucking figure. But what do we get instead? Fucking Wraith. Fucking Zartan-as-Raptor. We say we want the IDW versions; they repaint fucking Croc Master, one of the worst pegwarmers in the 25th Anniversary line.

Meanwhile, the stores are looking at those same fucking Arctic Destros and ROC Dr. Lewis figures that are covered with dust, and I'm not so sure they're going to be eager to carry Joes in the future unless something changes.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by RoIIo Tomassi »

Yes. My point being, a film (or lack thereof) wouldn't drastically change the reception of the toys in stores.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by anarky »

I dunno. It's hanging by a string as it is. Even a flop movie would move some toys. However, a full movie toyline with no movie... this does not bode well. I could actually see Walmart or Target saying in March, "Yeah, your first movie line bombed, the second line came out way too early for us to warehouse them without paying a shitload of taxes for carrying them over the first of the year, so we had to put them out to rot for months until they got cleared out and we lost money on them. And the franchise sells like shit when there's no movie because we don't pay attention and see it's that one fucking idiot with the parka and metal mask that's clogging up the shelves. What the fuck makes you think we'd carry this shit again?"

I looked at a few sites to see if there's any word on the line. Some are speculating that previously canceled figures like Kwinn may get released, along with possibly some of the repaints and updates of old figures in the Retaliation line (like the new CG or the Alley Viper repaint). I hope so. I doubt it, but I hope so.
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Re: G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero

Post by Ran »

http://www.aintitcool.com/node/55968

So the delay may be due to the studio wanting to shoot it in 3D...and they didn't want to go up against Spiderman....and because it sucked and want to re-do it.
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