Secret ingredient

awwww, man, food is awesome...but pooping it out is alot better

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anarky
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Secret ingredient

Postby anarky » Thu Jul 18, 2013 12:10 pm

Not sure why I came up with this, but I can't stop laughing at it, so maybe I'm a sick, stupid fucker.

A young woman gets married, and her new husband is always raving about his grandmother's chicken. The couple eats at his grandparents' house, and she can't quite put her finger on what is so special about the chicken. She tries a few times to replicate the unique flavor, and fails.

Finally, she asks the grandmother how she does it. She says there's a secret she uses, and it's not known to another living soul. However, as she's getting old, she's willing to pass on the secret. She tells the woman to come over the next evening, so she can watch her make a batch of chicken.

Everything looks pretty standard at first. The grandmother cuts the chicken into pieces, then puts it into a resealable bag. However, when the woman excepts her to add the breading, she instead drops her pants, presses the bag against her butt, and lets out a huge fart, filling the bag with gas. She immediately seals the bag and puts it in the refrigerator. "That's my secret--you let the chicken marinate in the fart for about an hour and capture the flavor!"
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Tom Foolery
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Re: Secret ingredient

Postby Tom Foolery » Thu Jul 18, 2013 1:41 pm

No, that's pretty funny. I'm picturing it as like a five minute short film. And the grandma farting in the bag is fucking hilarious. The sound effect. The look of horror on the wife. The look of relief on the grandma's face as she floats the air biscuit. I can see it all. It's hil-fuckin-arious.
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Slicker
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Re: Secret ingredient

Postby Slicker » Thu Jul 18, 2013 8:47 pm

I can just picture this old lady cupping a Ziploc over her wrinkly ass and farting and moving really fast to try and seal it before the flavor escapes.
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Turdeto
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Re: Secret ingredient

Postby Turdeto » Thu Jul 18, 2013 8:56 pm

Ok, who let my grandma's secret recipe out of the bag?


Oh, I guess it was her. Never underestimate the power of the brown side.

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shroba fett
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Re: Secret ingredient

Postby shroba fett » Fri Jul 19, 2013 11:49 pm

Ohmigosh that is so gross ha ha I think my gramma already smells like farts and when we go over and visit her at her trailer park she only ever has fruit to eat and no candy and potato chips and we have to watch Family Feud on TV because that's all thats on. And General Hospotal. Yuck. But my mom says gramma will move away soon or something and I'll remember these precious moments or whatever that means.
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