Pages from a Diary

okay i can hear you now. and i don't want to. why don't you go fuck slicker's mom and get out of my face?

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Capt. Jack Sparrow
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by Capt. Jack Sparrow »

Where does your allegiance lie?
I always liked you.
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Willy Wonka
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by Willy Wonka »

All you pirate captains are really weird.
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Edward Scissorhands
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by Edward Scissorhands »

You all look like someone I know.
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The Grin
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by The Grin »

:thegrin:

Well, I guess it's time to post another entry.
Bizarro The Grin wrote: wOW! iT'S gROUNDHOG dAY! nO, i DIDN'T SEE A GROUND HOG, BUT i WAS IN THE SACK WITH dOUBLE_g'S FATHER, AND A TURD PEAKED OUT OF HIS ASS. wHEN IT SAW MY BIG BLACK DICK, IT WENT BACK IN THE HOLE. i GUESS THAT MEANS 6 MORE WEEKS OF FUCKING!

:D
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The Grip
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Location: Also making zee zveet love to your mothair

Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by The Grip »

For your reading plaishure, here are some more, how you say? Excairpts!
i'M SO GLAD i'M NOT THE nON-bIZARRO gRIN. aPPARENTLY WOMEN HAVE TO WAIT SIX WEEKS AFTER GIVING BIRTH TO HAVE SEX, SO HE CAN ONLY GET ORAL FROM NEW MOTHERS. fATHERS, ON THE OTHER HAND, ARE READY TO GO THE MINUTE THAT BABY POPS OUT.

:D
i CALL aNTROPOV "hONEY bUNCHES OF oATS." bECAUSE HE'S A MOUTHFUL OF JOY.

:D
tHE OTHER DAY, WE WERE ALL HANGING OUT, AND tHE gRIP WOULDN'T SHUT UP ABOUT "yOUR MOTHAIR THIS, YOUR MOTHAIR THAT." i HAD TO LEAVE THE ROOM. i TOLD THEM THAT, IF THEY NEEDED ME, i'D BE IN JJREASON'S ASSHOLE.

:D
i WENT TO COLLEGE WITH A REAL DADDY'S GIRL. hER NAME WAS sHERRY. sHE ALWAYS SAID, "mY HEART BELONGS TO DADDY." aND i'D SAY, "tHAT'S GREAT BECAUSE HIS ASS BELONGS TO ME!"

:D
i STILL REMEMBER THE FIRST TIME i MET rOGUE ii. hE WAS ADMIRING HIS FIRSTBORN, AND i GRABBED HIM, PULLED HIM INTO A BROOM CLOSET, AND STARTED HAVING MY WAY WITH HIS ASS. wE'D ONLY BEEN IN THERE ABOUT A MINUTE BEFORE THE DOCTOR KNOCKED ON THE DOOR AND SAID, "kEEP IT DOWN IN THERE! tHIS IS A HOSPITAL, AND SOME FOLKS NEED THEIR SLEEP!"

:D
:arrow: :frus:
Zat ees me, focking your mothair!
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The Grin
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by The Grin »

:thegrin:

It appears Bizarro The Grin has been to the movies recently.
Bizarro The Grin wrote: i EARNED THE NICKNAME OF sPEED rACER. ME AND bIZZARO tHE gRIP WENT TO SEE sPEED rACER AND ukwILDCAT'S DAD SAT BETWEEN US. rIGHT AFTER THE LIGHTS DIMMED DOWN AND SETTLED INTO OUR SEATS, hE SAID HIS POPCORN WAS MISSING SOMETHING. hE ASKED bIZZARO tHE gRIP AND i IF WE WANTED TO HAVE A LITTLE RACE OF OUR OWN. hE PULLED OUT BOTH OF OUR THINGS AND BEGAN TO STROKE. i THOUGHT i WAS THE WINNER, UNTIL i SAW HOW HAPPY ukwILDCAT'S FATHER WAS THAT i BUTTERED HIS POPCORN.

:D
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Ran
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by Ran »

You really should stop posting these. Seriously.
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The Grin
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by The Grin »

:thegrin:

Believe it or not, I found The Griz's diary. OYES!
The Griz wrote:Today I was walking through the jungle when I spotted a lion getting a drink from a stream. His tail was high in the air, so I snuck up behind him and started humping him. He turned around and started chasing me. I came across a human hunting camp and hid in one of the tents. I put on the hunter's clothes and pretended to read the paper. The lion stuck his head in the tent and said, "Hey, anyone in here see a polar bear?" I said, "The one that just fucked a lion in the ass?" He said, "Holy shit! It's in the newspaper already?!?!"
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The Grin
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by The Grin »

:thegrin:

Did I mention I have Bizzaro The Grip's diary as well?
bIZZARO THE gRIP wrote:oH HO HO! tODAY ah WENT TO sENIOR bIZARRO tHE gREEN'S CASA. hE ASHOW ME HEEZ LIVING ROOM. eSITTING IN EL CORNER THERE WAS UN GORILLA MUY GRANDE. aH ESAY, "pORQUE DO YOU HAVE UN GORILLA?" hE ESAYS "wATCH THEES!" hE TAKES UN EBASEBOL BAT AND HEETS ZEE GORILLA EN EL CABEZA! eL gORILLIA UNBUCKLES ZEE TROUSERS DEL bIZARRO THE gREEN Y PROCEEDS TO GEEV HEEM UN BLOW JOB. sENIOR bIZARRO tHE gREEN TURNS TO ME AND SAY "dO YOU WANT TO TRY?" aH SAY, "eSURE, PERO NO HEET ME THAT HARD!"
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The Grin
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by The Grin »

:thegrin:

Guess who thinks they can write a novel? Yes, the father fucker himself. He wants to call it "50 Shades of Gay"
Bizarro The Grin wrote:...i CRAMMED MY THROBBING MEMBER INTO HIS TIGHT VIRGIN ASS. wHEN IT STRUCK MUD, i PULLED IT OUT AND WIPED IT UNDER HIS NOSE, GIVING HIM THE FILTHIEST OF ALL sANCHEZES...

:D
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The Grin
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by The Grin »

:thegrin:

Ok, back to his diary.
Bizarro The Grin wrote:i THOUGHT DEVASTATOR DID A NUMBER ON zAPHOD'S FATHER'S ASS UNTIL zAPHOD'S MOTHER CAME INTO THE ROOM WEARING THAT STRAP-ON. sHE REALLY TAUGHT HIM A LESSON.

:D
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The Grin
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Re: Pages from a Diary

Post by The Grin »

:thegrin:

The true reason anarky hates Hawkeye.
Bizarro The Grin wrote:tONIGHT i HAD MY REGULAR STOP AT ANARKY'S HOUSE. hE LOVES THE COCK. tO MY SURPRISE, hE WAS ALREADY GETTING HIS RUMP FILLED WITH WHEN i GOT THERE. i KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, BUT iT WASN'T bIZZARO tHE gRIP. iT WAS hAWKEYE IN A POORLY MADE bIZZARO THE gRIN DISGUISE LAUNCHING PURPLE DILDO ARROWS AT ANARKY'S ASS. hE WAS SURPRISINGLY ACCURATE, HITTING THE BROWN EYE EVERY TIME. iT TURNS OUT pERPENTOR TRICKED hAWKEYE INTO DOING IT...SOMETHING ABOUT SOME SUPERVILLIAN HIDING A BONER IN ANARKY'S ASS. pERPENTOR EVEN PROVIDED THE DISGUISE AND TOLD HIM TO WEAR IT BECAUSE IT WAS THE EASIEST WAY IN. i TOLD HAWKEYE THAT i PERSONALLY EXAMINED ANARKY'S ANUS ON A REGULAR BASIS AND THE ONLY BONER'S i'VE SEEN IN THERE WERE MINE, bIZZARO tHE gRIP'S, dEVESTATOR'S, AND MAYBE A FEW FARM ANIMALS'.

:D
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