Proud Moments in Fatherhood

okay i can hear you now. and i don't want to. why don't you go fuck slicker's mom and get out of my face?

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Ran
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Proud Moments in Fatherhood

Post by Ran »

1) When your kid realizes that farts are funny.
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kidhuman
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Post by kidhuman »

When your kid yells out the car window verbatim what you yelled at the cab driver.
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Diabolical
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Post by Diabolical »

Saying goodbye to your kids as you watch them swirl down the drain.
"As they say in China, 'Arrivederci'!"
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*For the creation of the Golden Deuce Award.
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anarky
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Post by anarky »

As your baby is babbling and, somehow among all the ma-ma-mas and da-da-das, works in a hearty "God damn!!"

Yeah, we did a double take. Total coincidence, but funny as hell.
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*--For behavior unbecoming anyone, perpetrated in real time over an extended--AH, FUCK IT! MORE MALIBU, BITCHES!!
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jjreason
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Post by jjreason »

Any time poop winds up on someone who really doesn't like it is a proud moment.
"Something inside me....."
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Eternal Padawan
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Post by Eternal Padawan »

The first time your DAUGHTER throws a perfect spiral across the back yard is pretty cool.
"Say Jim! WHOOOO! That is a bad outFIT! Whooo!"--Pimp, Superman The Movie
"You're an idiot, Starscream." --Megatron,Transformers: The Movie
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kidhuman
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Post by kidhuman »

When they actually stop shitting in their pants
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anarky
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Post by anarky »

When you take a massive dump into a clean diaper, put it on the baby's butt, and then wait for mommy to find it.
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*--For behavior unbecoming anyone, perpetrated in real time over an extended--AH, FUCK IT! MORE MALIBU, BITCHES!!
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Bizarro The Grin
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Post by Bizarro The Grin »

oH, ADMIT IT. tHE PROUDEST MOMENT IN FATHERHOOD IS WHEN bIZZARO tHE gRIP AND i STOP BY AND DO YOU LIKE YOU WANT TO BE DONE.

sHOW OF HANDS: HOW MANY OF YOU BLED THE FIRST TIME YOU FELT MY BIG, BLACK DICK?


:D
"fREUD SAID, 'sOMETIMES A CIGAR IS JUST A CIGAR.'

oH, YEAH? wELL SOMETIMES IT'S A BIG, BROWN DICK."

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* - fOR AWARD-WINNING FATHER-LOVING.
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kidhuman
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Post by kidhuman »

When they actually start doing things for themselves and stop asking you for everything.
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Ran
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Post by Ran »

While watching one of the Star Wars prequels, your kid tells you that it isn't really Star Wars.
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Ran
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Post by Ran »

When they are old enough to know not to kick you in the balls.
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Antropov
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Post by Antropov »

Rogue II wrote:When they are old enough to know not to kick you in the balls.
I am SERIOUSLY looking forward to that.

I guess I'm not to the "cool" proud stuff yet. I'm still in the proud of them for putting Cheerios in my mouth when I open it, them clapping when I beatbox to them and them dancing when anyone of their toys makes the slightest, most random sound.
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:grillmarks:
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Slimmie
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Post by Slimmie »

CaptainSolo1138 wrote:
Rogue II wrote:When they are old enough to know not to kick you in the balls.
I am SERIOUSLY looking forward to that.
They will just find another way to get the job done. Ever watch America's Funniest Videos? Every dad takes a shot in the Duke boys with a wiffle ball bat.
"America is all about speed.
Hot, nasty, bad-ass speed."
Eleanor Roosevelt, 1936
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Antropov
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Post by Antropov »

I had a proud moment a couple weeks ago, caught on camera for the ages:

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:grillmarks:
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