The greatest thing ever would be...

anything that don't fit under any other category...like your mothers fat ass

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anarky
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The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by anarky »

...irrefutable evidence of Ronald Reagan being gay.

Not that I have anything against Reagan, or think this would be a bad thing if it were true. It's just that some people really, really fucking worship the man. They overlook that he wouldn't have a shot at winning a Republican primary today because he'd actually be too moderate. I think many of them raise goats just to sacrifice to the memory of the Gipper.

And these people are so anti-gay, I can't even joke about it. Because there exists no joke to do their homophobia justice.

Such evidence would cause the Reagan worshippers to explode. It would be hilarious to watch. We're talking "Arrested Development somehow crosses over with Space Ghost: Coast to Coast" hilarious.
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RoIIo Tomassi
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by RoIIo Tomassi »

I've always kinda hoped Rick Santorum and Michelle Bachmann and those Westboro Baptist Church people; all of them have children who come out.
THAT would be hilarious.
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by anarky »

That would be hilarious.

But you must admit that Reagan would be a much larger scale of hilarity. Legions upon legions of people.
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by Ran »

All of the senior enlisted guys when I first joined the military loved Reagan. When Carter was President, the lower ranks of the military needed food stamps. When Reagan took office, he gave the military raises so they were above the poverty line.

A Kennedy gay sex tape would really shake things up, but I agree with Rollo that Santorum and Bachmann coming out of the closet be hilarious.
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by RoIIo Tomassi »

Kennedy was a toolbag. I bet he was AC/DC and smoked his share of pole behind closed doors at one of his many debaucheries. I wouldn't bat an eye if that ever came out.
I think we've had this discussion elsewhere before, but there's very few people whose 'coming out' would make me go "Whaaat?!? Him/Her?? No way!!"
It's pretty much a non issue for me. I just delight in the fact it makes conservative assholes squirm. Fer instance, I could give a shit about Glee, but the idea that there's three gay couples on the show, and some dickwad like L. Brent Bozell punching himself in the crotch repeatedly in furious indignation over it, makes me beam. :mrgreen:
The fact is, if every gay paired up and got married this very instant, the sun would rise tomorrow and the world would not implode. Nor would anything remarkable happen. It'd just be another day. And if the following day every single one of those newly married gay couples decided to adopt a child, the world would not end. Nor would anything remarkable happen (other than a bunch of children getting raised in loving homes). That's the boring truth of it. Get over yourselves, conservatives.
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by RoIIo Tomassi »

I thought it would be funny to take a conservative's typical anti-gay rant and replace 'gay' with 'person of Dutch ancestry'.
Go on and on about how being Dutch is a lifestyle choice, and Dutch marriage would lead to bestiality, the Dutch demoralize our institution of family values. And these would all be reasons why Dutch shouldn't be allowed to marry. And hopefully have some conservative ninny would finally step up and say "Your arguments are ridiculous and have no basis in logic."

Then I could say "Exactly." and walk away whistling.
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by anarky »

These are the crackpots that bitch that Bert and Ernie are gay. I've noticed they don't share a bed anymore like they did when I was a kid. Bowing to pressure, I suppose.

(Of course, you've got the crackpots on the opposite side telling CTW they need to take Bert and Ernie out of the closet already.)
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by RoIIo Tomassi »

Speaking of ignorant haters!

Moms rage against Archie Gay Marriage!

I followed the link and sent a positive e-mail to TRU supporting the comic. Heh, fuck you Moms!
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by Diabolical »

RoIIo Tomassi wrote:Speaking of ignorant haters!

Moms rage against Archie Gay Marriage!

I followed the link and sent a positive e-mail to TRU supporting the comic. Heh, fuck you Moms!
I saw that link and all I could think of was Chasing Amy.
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anarky
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by anarky »

Ask a raging homophobe who uses Christianity as an excuse to point out the verse in Leviticus that condemns homosexuality. They'll be able to do that very quickly.

Then ask them when Jesus specifically--not the Old Testament, or an early Christian commenting on Jesus' teachings--said a single word about homosexuality. They won't be able to. No such verse exists.

Then ask them to define the "New Covenant" as described by Jesus (essentially, that he overturns the old laws aside from the Ten Commandments, which are mostly just common sense morality stuff about not killing or stealing).

Then be so kind as to point out other things banned in Leviticus, such as being in the same building as a woman on her period, tattooing or piercing your body, and eating pork. And shrug and say, "Can't have it both ways."

Fun fact: the only thing marriage-related that Jesus condemned was divorce, which was probably not because it was wrong, and more likely because women were considered property and divorcing a woman was sentencing her to death or a life of poverty and/or prostitution.
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by Ran »

anarky wrote:These are the crackpots that bitch that Bert and Ernie are gay. I've noticed they don't share a bed anymore like they did when I was a kid. Bowing to pressure, I suppose.

(Of course, you've got the crackpots on the opposite side telling CTW they need to take Bert and Ernie out of the closet already.)
They shared a bed? I thought they had separate beds in the same bedroom. Now, the Three Stooges seemed to always share a bed.
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anarky
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by anarky »

I seem to recall them sharing one. I've still got some sheets from when I was a wee lad, and the pillowcase has them in one bed.
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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by Ran »

This is the set-up I remember. It looks like 2 beds. Ironically, Ernie ends up in Bert's bed at the end of this video. Your parents must have bought you the gay version of the bed sheets.

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Re: The greatest thing ever would be...

Post by anarky »

That would explain why my uncle Roy had to share a bed with me.

I used to have problems pooping, so he had some sort of thing he'd use at night to try to help me out and loosen the stool from the inside.
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